How To “5Star Goal Setting & Getting”

5 star Goal Setting and GettingI wrote an article recently about “5 Star Goal Setting & Getting” as a guest blogger over on gps-SpeakerMarketing.com (check it out) but I reserved the ideas that follow for my own readers.  Take a look at the ideas below and leave a comment to tell me if you think they will take your goal setting (and getting) to a whole new level !

1) Start small when Goal Setting.

It is more important to develop the habit of goal setting and getting than it is to go for the biggest goal you can imagine.  Certainly there is some excitement when you “reach for the brass ring” but setting and achieving goals will give you the confidence to actually tackle your larger goals.

In addition, smaller goals can lead to bigger goals.  You might find that once you meet a certain goal that the larger goal no longer excites you and you can make adjustments along the way.

2) Grow your goals.

Build on your successes and learn from your failures.  As you strive to expand your goals, the skills you learn on smaller goals will help you on the way to bigger and bigger goals.

3) Celebrate and enjoy your success.

Goal setting adds a clear cut sense of a black and white to what is usually a long road of gray.  Life is a journey and we often forget to celebrate our accomplishments when we are caught up in the process and focused on the goal on the horizon.

Finally, rely on motivation, not self-discipline.

A good goal is exciting when you set it.  You can envision it happening and it fills you with anticipation of its completion.  The problem is most people do not hold themselves to that standard of motivation and they set goals that do not get them excited.

Think about it …

If your goal does not motivate you now, how likely is it that your motivation is going to carry you all the way to completion?  Self-discipline is a wonderful thing, but it is a limited resource and if you start using it up right from the start, there won’t be enough “gas in the tank” to get you to your destination.  Save your self-discipline for the times along the way when you encounter stumbling blocks or obstacles and have to put in an extra effort.

Set your first goal … and go for it !

Goal Setting Bonus !

As an added bonus, I’ve created a downloadable free pdf 5 Star-GoalSetting-handout that I use for my 5Star Goal Setting & Getting workshops.  (Right-click highlighted text in the previous sentence and select “Save As” to download the pdf worksheet to your computer).  If you want to learn more about what each star represents, be sure to read my guest blogger article over at gps-speakermarketing.com/goal-setting/.

 

Accountability Partners – The Power of…

Accountability Partner PowerWe all need someone to hold us accountable for the things that we say we are going to do.  If we can’t hold ourselves accountable, then we may need an Accountability Partner !

What is an Accountability Partner?

Simply put, an Accountability Partner is someone that you tell your goals and/or actions so that they can “hold you accountable”.  It is one thing to say you are going to do something and quite another to have someone who won’t let you off the hook with all the excuses you usually use to justify not meeting your goals.  Accountability is one of the reasons that Alcoholics Anonymous is so successful… each person is paired with a “sponsor” who can serve, either directly or indirectly, as an accountability partner through the sobriety process.

How do Accountability Partners work?

Usually partners discuss their goals with each other and commit to hold each other accountable for the (mutually agreed) most important action.  The key is to meet on a regular basis so that you and your partner can keep an eye on your progress and “turn up the heat” on the activities leading to your goal as needed.

How do I find an Accountability Partner?

There are online communities that can provide a form of accountability (like http://gentlenudge.me/ or others for specific activities such as writing or spiritual development) but the best Accountability Partner is someone who you see face-to-face on a regular basis.  A friend or family member might work but they may be too easy on you and let you use your arsenal of excuses.  Someone with a shared interest might be better even if it means setting up specific times to meet and discuss your goals / actions.  Another option could be Networking Groups.  Check out the one created by Heather Hansen O’Neill called Adventure 2 Connection.  She puts together like-minded people for fun activities and networking.

 

Example of an Accountability Partner…

The HEAD guy when it comes to marketing - Seth Godin

A friend of mine is part of a Mastermind group in Florida and was working with his accountability partner from the group to determine what sort of “penalty” might be the most effective incentive if he does not meet his declared goal/action.  Financial incentives would have to be pretty big since my friend has plenty of money.  He is also not easily embarrassed so a public admission of failure probably would not do it, although that seemed to be closer to the answer.  What did he choose as an incentive?  He promised that if he did not fulfill his commitment that he would go FULL SETH GODIN (and shave his head).  As an added bonus, I put together a little audio clip to give him a little remind of what is at stake (click here for Accountability Sound Clip).

When are you going to build Accountability into your life?

The longer you wait, the farther away your dreams become.  Only if you are accountable for your actions today will you be able to enjoy the rewards in the future.  Get an accountability partner today and start building the habit of being someone that you can count on.  You won’t regret it !

 

How the Lottery Screws With Your Head

A lottery ticket reveals your
mental programming about money!

lotteryticket-mental-programming-for-wealth

Let’s face it.  Everyone expects to win the grand prize when they purchase a lottery ticket… contrary to the statistics that say you are more likely to be hit by a bus, but our general lack of understanding when it comes to reality is a story for another article.

We all have mental programming that creates our attitudes & beliefs about creating wealth in our lives.  Buying a lottery ticket and evaluating the stories in your head can reveal the inner workings of your mind and the ways that it has been programmed.

What happens in your head when you buy a lottery ticket?

The first thing that happens is that your mind, both consciously and subconsciously, is that you start playing out scenarios of what you would do when you win based on the deep, ingrained mental programming you have accumulated over your life.  (Note that I said “when you win”, not “if you win”.  The mind only cares about the winning scenario at this point.)

Pretty much everyone’s “winning lottery scenario” falls into one of the following 3 categories…

(1) Let’s Buy Toys !
or the “YAY, I’m Rich! I can do anything!” scenario…

This involves speculation on all the great things that you can buy… new, fancy cars, boats, planes (?), new clothes, a big house, lavish parties, trips to exotic locations and much, much more.  Since a lottery win is so far beyond most people’s current level of spending it seems like anything is possible.  But do you notice something about this fantasy?  All the money is going OUT of the winner’s pocket once they win.

What does this reveal about your mental programming about wealth?

First, the odds are you are probably poor or lower middle class.  Even if you aren’t now, you will probably end up that way because of your spending habits.  Why?  Because you spend money on things that go down in value or that have no intrinsic (built-in) value.

It is also likely that you buy more than a few lottery tickets per year since you feel the chances of you building a large fortune from scratch

(2)  Give it away !
or the “Share the Wealth” scenario

You imagine how much you will give to charities, what you might buy for your friends and your family and how grateful they will be for being a part of your windfall.

What does this reveal about your mental programming about wealth?

This type of scenario shows that, at some level, you feel that you don’t deserve to be wealthy.  You probably apply this same thinking to other areas of your life to make sure that you do not get too far ahead of your peer group in terms of wealth.  In other words, you hold yourself back to the level of your current status where you are comfortable and people are comfortable with you.

Can you break out of this thinking?  Sure, but it will take a conscious decision to recognize who is honestly would support your increased wealth and who would rather you were more like them.

Alternatively, you may think that you (or “life in general”) should be “fair” and if you have good luck, then you need to spread it around as much as possible.  There is probably a good bit of “guilt programming” built in there too saying that if you have more than others than you should feel guilty about it.  (Recognize any religious overtones here?)

Again, you can break out of this thinking by recognizing that it shows up in your mind and replacing it with more productive thoughts such as “I deserve to be wealthy and by learning the mental techniques I can teach others how to bring themselves up to my level instead of giving them crumbs from my plate.”  It is the old story, “Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day.  Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.”

(3) Invest in … 
or the “More of what I’m already doing” scenario.

Since you already understand how to grow your wealth, you see a lottery win as something different from most people.  You see it as simply accelerating your current strategy for wealth creation.  Because of this, you rarely buy a lottery ticket (probably less than one a year) and you do it for the entertainment value without worrying about whether or not you will eventually accumulate millions.

Perhaps you buy a ticket when there is an especially large jackpot that catches your attention.  Or maybe you are facing challenges to your plan for wealth accumulation and you feel that a lottery win would help smooth over some of life’s rough patches.

Unfortunately, you eventually realize that money is not the answer to your problems.  More money brings different problems … but that’s OK since it is part of the growth process of life.  Plus, wouldn’t you rather have the problem of managing millions of dollars instead of scraping by to pay your bills each month?

What does this mean for your mental programming towards wealth?

Since most people are a mix of the three responses shown above, it is easy to see how we are all programmed to think certain ways about money.  Your primary response to your lottery win scenario tells you about how your react to money in all areas of your life because the subconscious programming in your mind doesn’t turn off.  It is there whenever you encounter an opportunity to make money or an opportunity to spend or waste money.  If you bring your programming into your conscious mind, you can begin to make changes and when you change your mental programming for wealth, you will notice more opportunities for wealth building as well as ways you can hold onto more of what you already have.

Is there a little-known “4th Scenario”?

Losing Lottery Ticket - Mental Programming 4 WealthAt this point you are probably wondering what I thought of when I got the lottery ticket shown in the photo on this page, right?  Well, I can honestly say that I thought of all three scenarios.  I would probably get a new car (since I am overdue for an upgrade) and most of the money would go towards real estate purchases (NYC brownstone, ski lodge).  It would also help fund my charity which will help teach wealth mentality to more people.

I also created the “4th Scenario” where I bought a lottery ticket (over $130 million grand prize), checked the numbers after the drawing (I lost, of course) and then I wrote an article about it so that the ticket can become a business expense.  :))

What’s your mental programming towards wealth?

Where do you fit?  What stories do you create in your mind when you buy a lottery ticket?  Leave a reply in the comment section below and tell us what you found out about your own mental programming for wealth !

 

“The Epidemic of Failure” speech

The video below is dMark “Dave” Wheeler’s 2013 contest speech titled “The Epidemic of Failure”.  Please your comments and feedback below !

What is the Epidemic of Failure?

 

 

What does Failure mean to you?

Assuming you have watched the Epidemic of Failure video, the question you might be thinking is “What failures do I have in my past that I can learn from?” or “Am I failing enough right now to make progress toward my dreams?”  Either way, an intimate understanding of what you consider failure vs. what you consider “learning experiences” will greatly affect how you frame both past and future events in your life.

 

Are you facing your own Epidemic of Failure?

Do you have a story about failure? Perhaps one that relates to one of the ideas presented by dMark “Dave” Wheeler?

 

Our favorite “epidemic of failure” quote…

Success as the ability to go from failure to failure … without losing your enthusiasm.      - Winston Churchill

 

Did you learn?

We must Keep Failing.  Encourage Failure in others, especially your loved ones.

Fail Often … so you are less sensitive to it and can learn from every failure.

Fail Fast… so the sting won’t last and you can bound back faster.

and Fail Small … so you can make small adjustments before the stakes get large.

 

Additional Reading on the Mindset of Failure…

“Fail Forward by John Maxwell”

 

Comments Appreciated !

Please leave your “Epidemic of Failure” comments below so that Dave and others can learn from your experiences !

 

What is Life’s Meaning?

When was the last time you thought about Life’s Meaning?

Have you ever asked yourself one or all of the following questions?
What is Life all About?
What is My Life going to mean when it is done?
What is Important in Life?
In other words, What is Life’s Meaning… for you?.

Very few people take the time to think about the purpose of life on a regular basis but those that do are able to achieve much more than you can even imagine.

Wikipedia says

embracing ikigai”, or ” the reason for being/reason for getting out of bed”…

Ikigai is the idea that life is filled with purpose is one worth living and there is always a reason to get up in the morning. The Fraternal Order of Moai (known as Ipu Ki) is the Polynesian tradition of forming a social network and creating safety nets through friendships so that people can feel they have something or in this case somebody to fall back upon if something were to go wrong.

What is your “reason for getting out of bed”?

The book by Dan Buettner The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living for Living Longer from People Who have Lived the Longest states that people who live longer, stronger lives have a stronger sense of ikigai.  When people retire, it’s a proven fact that the ones that do not have something to do that is important to them are the first ones who die.  Research shows that making the best of life and living it to the fullest isn’t about genetics at all, it’s what you make if it each and every day!

Are you making “A Great Life” every day?

Off the coast of Greece there is a small island called Icaria.  The residents who live there are known to be the longest living in perhaps the entire world.  Many of which do not know actually how old they are due to the fact that they don’t keep track of time, they don’t wear watches, in fact the clocks in their homes never say the correct time.  They get up when they want to, eat when they want to, are more sexually active through their later years in life, have more sense of community and spend more time being social….is that the key to a meaningful life?

Something to think about !

 

 

Day2 Resources from Tim Ferriss’ “4 Hour Life” on CreativeLIVE

Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life Day 2

If you watched Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life streaming video on Creative LIVE you noticed that he threw out a bunch of references to resources and recommends.  Below is a the Day 2 partial list of all the great people, websites and products that he mentioned.

If you were able to watch Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life streaming video on Creative LIVE you would have noticed that he threw out a bunch of references to resources that he recommends.  This is a partial list of all the great people, websites and products that he mentioned.
Day 2
Noah @AppSumo.com
Injure on Reddit.com  (didn’t get all of this reference)
book: Drop Dead Healthy by A.J.Jacobs (on Amazon)
Start day with GAEBY:  Gratitude, Attitude, Exercise, Breakfast, You
Rejection Phone Numbers / HiNoah@AppSumo.com / RejectionTherapy.com
“Letters by a Stoic” by Seneca (inoculate yourself against fear, “is the condition I so feared?”)
TacoDeli.com (to Noah’s heart thru his stomach?)
Eric Reis “Vanity Metrics
Case Study:  Mola (biodegradable toothbrushes)
sethbrooklyn2@gmail.com (100 at $50 each via Paypal)
Case Study:  Corey
22 Laws of Marketing by
Y-Combinator “What are your prospective customers currently cobbling together to solve a problem?”
520or90.com ”Find out which bridge is faster or cheaper in less than 10 seconds”
Work backward from a specific number (e.g. “top app”)
Google Forms… “What’s Your Email?” “Who is your friend who scares you?  What’s their email?”
@millionaireby25
Guest: Dave Camarillo, Guerilla Jiu Jitsu
“Own Your Walk”
4 Hr. Chef “Kitchen Segment:
Monell Chemical Senses Center
Pantry Setup:
Salts – 3 types… (missed the names.  Please add them in the comments if you got them.)
Mackavoy Olive Oil
Grape seed Oil
Ghee (in place of oil)
Coconut Oil
Wellness Effects.com
Sherry Vinegar
Champagne Vinegar
Dijon Mustard (watch for sugar)
Beans, Lentils,…
Kitchen Gear Plus:
Porlex or Horio Coffee Grinder (portable)
Aeropress
Temp Probe
Lodge Cast Iron Skillet ($20-30)
Glycerin
Chocolate
Knives…
Lettuce Knife
butcher looking knife (name?) $6-9 Amazon.com
Koon Raccoon (spelling?) peelers $8
[Slow Carb] Butterfinger Recipe…Sweet Potato (6 min. in microwave, scoop/mash), scoop of Chocolate Whey Protein, 1 tablespoon of Peanut butter, mix & eat.
Guest: Chase Jarvis
Guest: Rick Torbett
IceboxAthlete.com website “Lower Emotional Content” 3F’s – Flush Emotions, Fix it, Forget it
Guest: John Jackson, Founder, ArcheryTag.com
Conclusion by Tim:
Memento mori is a Latin phrase translated as “Remember your mortality”, “Remember you must die” or “Remember you will die” [wikipedia]
Why am I putting this list out?
While I hope this list is a real value to everyone who enjoys Tim’s books and blog, I am doing this for purely self-serving reasons.  I want people to visit my website so if you find this list useful, please post a link to it on Facebook or your blog.  If you like Tim’s stuff, I am sure you will like the articles on this site too !
* If you want more diet / brain training tips, check out my book, “Fat is all in your Head; 101 Small Decisions for Amazing Health” at www.FATisallinyourHEAD.com.  Sign up for the book mailing list and get the first 50 pages of my book !
The first day of Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life on Creative Live was outstanding too (check it out here)!
Leave your comments or additions below !

Day 1 Resources from Tim Ferriss’ “4 Hour Life” on CreativeLIVE

Tim-Ferris-4-Hour-Life-Day1

If you were able to watch Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life streaming video on Creative LIVE you would have noticed that he threw out a bunch of references to resources that he recommends.  This is a partial list of all the great people, websites and products that he mentioned.

If you were able to watch Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life streaming video on Creative LIVE you would have noticed that he threw out a bunch of references to resources that he recommends.  This is a partial list of all the great people, websites and products that he mentioned.
Why am I putting this list out?
While I hope this list is a real value to everyone who enjoys Tim’s books and blog, I am doing this for purely self-serving reasons.  I want people to visit my website so if you find this list useful, please post a link to it on Facebook or your blog.  If you like Tim’s stuff, I am sure you will like the articles on this site too !
Resources:
SuperMemo (what is it?)

First Guest: Philippe von Borries, Refinery29
Gunderson Law Firm (for startups)… unsure of website.
Brad Feld, Boulder, CO
“Venture Deals Be Smarter Than Your Lawyer and Venture Capitalist” by Brad Feld (book on Amazon.com)
“Losing My Virginity” by Richard Branson (book on Amazon.com)
Unbounce.com (test landing pages)
Google Website Optimizer … “Website Optimizer has been integrated with Google Analytics as Content Experiments. To use Content Experiments, sign in to Analytics, open Standard Reporting, and in the Content section, click Experiments.”
Second Guest:  Leila Janah, Samasource.org
Third Guest: Neil Strauss, Author of “Everyone Loves You when you are dead
Joseph Campbell “The insecure way is the secure way” [follow your passion]
Program: “Freedom” (unplug & lock you out from internet)
Scrivener software (for MAC) (for Win) for writing scripts, books, etc.
ScreenFlow screen recordingDropBox.com
On Writing Well by William Zinsser (book)
Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott (book)
Brigade to Cuisine
wordpress for blogging (WordPress.com or WordPress.org)
Blog2Book examples …

   smitten kitchen cookbook
Stanford D School (free stuff online re: telling stories)
Learn a Language in 3 Months
michel thomas language recordings (Amazon)
Vis-ed.com (flash cards)
Japanese comic books
Slow Carb Diet *
Tim’s Dad… “30g of protein within 30 minutes of getting up each morning”… Myoplex by EAS

Dr. Kelly Starrett, physical therapist, www.mobilityWOD.com
YouTube videos
Mark Bell, weight lifter
* If you want more diet / brain training tips, check out my book, “Fat is all in your Head; 101 Small Decisions for Amazing Health” at www.FATisallinyourHEAD.com.  Sign up for the mailing list and get the first 50 pages of my book !
The first day of Tim Ferriss 4 Hour Life on Creative Live was outstanding and check back here for the resources list for Day 2 !
Leave your comments or additions below !

Speaker Demo Video for dMark “Dave” Wheeler

Speaker Demo Video of dMark “Dave” Wheeler – Mindset Training Expert

Text of the video:

WHEELER:  Now let’s talk about this big pink elephant.  That’s your subconscious mind.

Your subconscious mind is very powerful, it’s very large.  It takes in everything that’s going on, everything.  All of the emotions.

How do you control that elephant?  Does anybody know how they train elephants to stay with the circus so that they don’t kind of rampage off through the town?  Well what they do is when they’re small, they take a rope, not a big rope just a regular rope and tie it around their ankle and they stick a little stake in the ground.  Tiny little stake.  And the elephant doesn’t go anywhere.  Huge elephant that just pulled the tent up and he’s got a little rope around it and he says no I can’t do it.

How does that happen?  Well it started way back when he was a little elephant and he physically couldn’t pull it out.  He tried and he tried, couldn’t do it.  And eventually he learns I can’t pull it out, and he can easily pull that stake out.

As a matter of fact, when the circus goes to a new town, the elephant is the one that pulls the tent pulls up.  It’s powerful but it’s already decided that it can’t pull that stake out.

Right from when you were born you were being conditioned.  Your parents said don’t do that, you know.  Don’t do that, you should do this, and you believed it.  That became part of your conditioning, part of your programming.

Even now beyond friends and family you have the media.  And if it’s repeated enough, your mind says … well I’ve heard it ten, 20, 30 times and it must be true … even if it’s not.

Understand this, the most powerful form of conditioning are the words that are going on in your head, the words that you actually say.

There’s a rope on your elephant that’s holding you back, a rope that you could easily yank out. You have the choice.

You can train your brain to do whatever you want.  The choice is yours.

HIRE Dave to speak to your group !

Email:  dave [at] dmarkwheeler.com

 

Brain Game Training – update Week 2

As I first introduced in a post about Brain Games 2 Train Your Brain, the website www.lumosity.com has a unique program of online interactive games to train your brain.  They are also quantitative so you can track your progress using their BPI number.

What is Lumosity.com’s BPI number?

According to their website …

Brain Performance Index (BPI) is a measure of cognitive performance.

It is based on the combined results of your best games in each Brain Area – Memory, Attention, Speed, Flexibility, Problem Solving.

 What I have noticed so far:

I seem to be steadily improving my BPI score although I wonder if it is really effecting my brain’s structure or if it is simply a normal the learning process (similar to learning “the tricks” of a video game).  I have not yet seen any noticeable changes in my abilities to get things done in my business although I’m not exactly sure what I would be looking for.

One interesting Brain Game observation…

There is one game at Lumosity.com where the goal is to remember the names of various cartoon people to help improve your ability to remember people’s names.  As I played the game, I noticing that if a character looked familiar and I guessed at their name, I was right most of the time.  In a way, it may be giving me more confidence trusting my subconscious mind when it comes to remembering people’s names.

“Age is all in your mind”…

Another observation I have of Lumosity.com’s system is based on the fact that the “comparison function” groups people by their age in 5-10 year brackets.  I was curious  to see how I stacked up against other people of different ages so I put in a false birth date and re-ran the comparison statistics.  The graphics below show my scores as compared to 35-39 year olds and also 50-54 year olds.

I’m not saying which age group I am in… but I know that I’m hoping to interact with both ends of that range so I guess the comparative standings are good information to know.

Brain Game Training Week 2-30-39 y.o.


Brain Game Training Week 2 50-59 y.o.

If you know anyone at Lumosity.com, please forward a link to this article to them. I would love to hear more [in the comment section?] about how they set up the comparisons and why there is such a dramatic difference in index numbers for the different age groups. Is there a bias based on the design of the games? Is the sample size smaller for the older group and what effect does that cause?  How much of an effect is created by “self-selection”, i.e. younger people who enjoy online games choosing to participate vs. older people who are less likely to play online games?

Summary so far…

I am enjoying the games and find them a good way to get my head ready for work.  Sort of like a form of “productive procrastination”.  The real test will be to see what results I get after a month or two of brain game training.  Did I mention that I tend to get better scores after a caffeinated beverage?  It remains to be seen how the training will play out but I will keep you posted of the results as my head gets stronger & faster using Lumosity.com’s brain game training.

 

What do you think? Leave a comment and let me know your take on brain functionality !

Brain Games Train Your Brain

Brain Games based on ScienceLumosity Brain Games

When it comes to brain games, it seems like since the beginning of time, mankind has used games to develop useful skills.  I’m sure cavemen played “who can throw the spear the farthest” or “who can life the heaviest rock” or “who can slap a T-rex on the tail without getting eaten” (that last one may have been a predecessor to some of the stupid reality shows we have today).  While we have progressed quite a way since then (did you watch the Olympic Games in London?), there is still plenty of room for improvement when it comes to the training or conditioning of our brains through games.

I recently found a site called lumosity.com which has a neat way to “train your brain” that is a little different from my standard methods of mindset training.

The training on lumosity.com uses games based on neurological science (they are more fun than it sounds) and they focus on developing physical capabilities within the brain such as peripheral vision, spatial recognition and similar skills while my “brain training” is geared more toward using your brain to take control of your life.

Obviously I think taking control of your life is a little more important than peripheral vision, but I can’t argue with their theory that conditioning your brain through the use of games is a great way to keep your mental capabilities sharp, especially as you age.

Check out the site at www.lumosity.com and leave me a comment below to let me know if I should include a free trial to lumosity.com as part of my future Train Your Brain or Mindset Advantage Programs.